Donnerstag, 12. Februar 2015

On Having To Be Happy All The Time

Bild/picture: tumblr
Sometimes I feel like everyone around me is happy 24/7.
It starts with scrolling through my social network feeds where pictures of the yummiest food, the coolest clothes, the fittest and healthiest bodies or the most exotic travel destinations are popping up everywhere. Being a rational-thinking person (ok, no, I am not, but I should try to be) definitely helps to understand that - especially on sites like Facebook or Instagram - people only share the sweet sides of their lives. And that‘s totally okay, you don‘t have to tell the whole world when you have your period, the worst cramps and feel like a bloated walrus - that‘s your private thing which isn‘t something the boy you met drunk at a party in Barcelona is supposed to know. 
But I want to talk about being honest with people who are your friends in real life. I feel like even when I am in a smaller group of people, we still pretend that our lives are wonderful and that we are all happy all the time. Don‘t get me wrong here - I am super-happy (most-used word here ;)) for everyone who lives a content life and I don‘t want to tell anyone to pretend to have problems just to make me feel better. 
However, I think it is hard to admit not only to others, but also to yourself that you are not smiling all the time and that your life doesn‘t look like an ad for cereals when everyone talks about their great lives and how happy they are every single hour of the day. It is totally normal to feel down and sad every once in a while, it is normal to doubt decisions and paths you have taken in life - but we also need to be able to talk about this. We need to find a place where we can open up without feeling uncomfortable or like a „loser“. I have made the experience that when you start and say: „hey, to be completely honest with you - not everything is going so well at the moment“, people who are your true friends won‘t think „haha, her life is worse than mine“, no they will listen to you and this will make you feel better. It also happened a lot of times that when one person started to open up, others followed and it all ended in something like a (very liberating) self-helping group therapy. ;) 
Please bear in mind that I want you all to be happy and when you are and everything is just fine then it‘s wonderful - nevertheless, it is totally normal that not everything is always working out in your life and that there are times that are just not so Carrie-in-Manhattan-like and we should be able to be honest and admit that instead of always beating each other with who has a better life. Remember, real friendships aren‘t only there for the good times.

Have a nice day!
Laura

Kommentare:

  1. I love this post. Yeah, we can't be happy all the time, sometimes you just need to be real.
    Melanie @ meandmr.com

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  2. I am not happy today, my day stinks. But I still made a happy post on my blog an hour ago. I think it is a combination of not wanting to draw attention to small everyday-problems that we all have, but also a clever defense mechanism. Maybe a happy post will actually make one a bit happier? I really like this post Laura, it draws attention to a subject that is current in most lives, but nobody really talks about.

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  3. I think this is one of the reasons I find it so hard to make close friends with people. I like to be honest about how I'm feeling and if I can't talk to someone openly I find it quite hard to connect! xxx

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  4. There's no doubt about how everyone's life seems pefect through social media. People love sharing the best things in their lives, but I've also seen people show the not so happy side as well. I used to think about this all of the time and I know that we're only human, we have both good and bad things happening to us and it's okay for people to share what they feel. But like you said, no one needs to know how bad someone's cramps are. Hahaha

    Vegetarian Courtesy

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  5. Gosh dunno what it is today but i seem to be finding alot of post's on this topic and its just what i need right now! I'm the sort of girl who is always the life and soul of the party but sometimes i just dont want to be sometimes i need a day off you know? and it's like everyone always expects me to be the entertainment and its just too much, i am a happy person but sometimes i have my off days when i'm not to happy and i wish people would understand that

    Jess x
    New blog post up at // www.momentsofbeautywars.blogspot.co.uk

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  6. Definitely know what you mean hun! I'm always getting told "cheer up"...and it's like, I'm fine? Stop being so bloody smilely all the time! Love this post, glad i'm not the only one haha xx

    Sophie Elizabeth
    www.popcornandglitter.co.uk

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  7. Ein wirklich schöner Text!<3 Ich weiß, was du meinst! Du kannst toll schreiben!

    Alles Liebe
    Hanna

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  8. Great post and great photos. Like a lot. I follow you, could you follow back, pls. Kiss

    http://mylovelyfashionbih.blogspot.com/

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  9. Awesome post and thank you so much for putting it out there.
    So glad I am not the only one who thinks this!
    xox

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  10. Ein sehr schöner Text und vor allem richtig witzig zu lesen! :)
    Bin absolut deiner Meinung und es tut auch immer wieder gut sich mit Leuten auszutauschen, wenn man merkt, dass jeder mal so seine schlechten Tage hat. Immerhin kann man sich gegenseitig wieder aufbaun! :)

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